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I talk about being aware of your mental and emotional selves a lot on my blog. I wish I was better at taking my own advice, I give really good advice guys, but please make sure you find joy in what can seem like trying times. I also want to stress to take it easy on people and be patient. Primarily if, like me, you work with and deal with people and different personalities every day…
Read moreJuly was a big travel month. And I must say that it feels so good to get the fuck out of New York City. As much as I love my hometown, traveling to other places is good for the soul. The summer is rolling on and the blessings are coming through. My love/hate relationship with change is being tested. I am constantly fighting against my impulsive free spirit side with the side that is a creature of habit…
Read moreSix months ago, I was sick with COVID. Six months ago was my 32nd birthday. I was always one of the people that have looked at the pandemic as a blessing and a curse because there are times where you need to pause. And as an ambitious New Yorker, that did not seem possible. I, thank God, came out on the other side of COVID because it really set things off…
Read moreBy Patricia Rogers | Posted Friday, June 17, 2022
I am happy to finally be recapping the time I had at last month’s Invictus Pro Wrestling show in Ridgefield Park, New Jersey. It was one of the first big wrestling shows that would bring my favorite people in black wrestling together again since Wrestlemania 38 in Dallas. However, this one was special because it indeed was a family affair.
If you listen to my wrestling podcast, you have heard me talk about how my Dad got us all into wrestling. When I was growing up in the 90’s, it was all about watching Monday Night RAW. The weekly program during the “Attitude Era” was must-watch television. This was before streaming, YouTube, etc. So you had to make sure that you watched it when it aired or you would miss out. It was truly an exciting time, and I feel lucky to have experienced this with my family.
The monthly pay-per-views though is when the entire family got together. I have always been blessed to live down the hall from my God family. My Godmother, sister, and brothers were always close enough so that we can share our lives together. And wrestling, there was no exception. On those Sunday nights, they would come down the hall to watch the shows with us. My mom would cook a big meal, and it was the one Sunday a month where we could all stay up past my bedtime.
My Dad is surprised that we all still love wrestling the way that we do. But I think the most surprising part for him and me is the impact it had on my Godbrother, who is now a wrestler named J Boujii.
When I got back into wrestling around 2015, I was in love with it all over again. But it was the history and what goes on outside of the ring that fascinated me the most. This led to creating the podcast. However, when I talked to my Godbrother, it was all about what was inside the ring. He told me that he was working towards the goal of the Best Wrestler in the World.
You know at first, I was kind of worried and also like, are you sure you want to do this? The more I learned about the wrestling business, especially breaking into it, the more I was concerned that he was in way over his head. J Boujii, real name John Ruebel, was born in 1997 and was really close to my twin sister Letty and I. Letty and I were the youngest, so when John was born it was the first time we had someone younger to be around. So from the day he was born, we were protective of him.
He assured me that he knew what he was doing and was training with the best. I was able to watch him in some of his first matches and at the gym he was training with. Going to Gleason’s Gym in Brooklyn where he trained with WWE Hall of Famer Johnny Rodz, my concern eased greatly when I was able to see what a leader John was. He was smart, mature, and determined to make it and for the wrestling business to work for him.
So after having a couple of years of the wrestling podcast under my belt, I was able to reconnect with John to see how we can work together in wrestling because we exist on completely different sides of things — him being the athlete in the ring telling stories, and me commenting on wrestling outside of the ring. Earlier this year, I noticed that he was going to be in the biggest match of his career thus far.
J Boujii and the other three members of his faction, Takeover, were facing one of the most popular and successful factions on the independent wrestling scene, Shane Taylor Promotions. I was so excited because we all knew that this was the moment that would put J. Boujii on the map. This match was going to be a game-changer.
In the months leading up to the Invictus Takeover vs STP show, my Godbrother went into overdrive promoting the show all over social media. And his opponent Rev Ron Hunt of STP, did all that he could to hype the match. After an eventful Instagram Live, the hype was tangible as it became a Croc vs Ring light debate, which brought wrestling podcast producer Brian H. Waters into the storyline. So, the most anticipated match for the Takeover vs STP show was now a Bodega Street Fight having J. Boujii facing Rev Ron Hunt with Brian H. Waters serving as the guest referee.
Brian, also a lifelong wrestling fan, lived a dream that night in Ridgefield Park, NJ:
“Refereeing at Invictus Pro was an experience of a lifetime. As a pro wrestling fan, for my entire life I never thought that I would have an opportunity to do such a job.
Being in the ring, you could feel the electricity of the moment as both J. Boujii and Rev Ron Hunt entered the ring. ‘Big fight feel’ would be the best way to describe it.
During the match, I was doing my best not to mess up. I didn’t want to draw attention to myself or get in the way. Both men are professionals and knew that this was my first time being a referee, so they were patient with me.
The stipulation was if J. Boujii won, I would have to wear Crocs. He did get in my face one time, so my hands may have hit the surface a little quickly when Ron pinned him the first time. But in the end, I did count to three and unfortunately wear those Crocs. But one thing I can say… I was fair.
This is def something I would love to do it again… if the storyline dictates it.”
You can watch the full match here.
I could not be more proud of my Godbrother and his crew that came up in Gleason’s Gym. It was a night that showed me that I had nothing to worry about when it came to John. If anything, I became the biggest J. Boujii fan and can not wait to see how far he goes in this business. And what made that show the most memorable wrestling event I have ever been to, is that it was truly a family affair.
My Godsister Ivory (John’s mother) was there, my twin sister Letty took phenomenal photos of the event, and my closest friends Krista B., Seindole, Justin, Janelle and Dre of Jobber Tears Podcast were there. Brian H. Waters, one of my favorite people in the wrestling space, traveled from Baltimore, Maryland to guest referee, bringing along his Wrestling Wrealm brother Hugh.
The funniest part though is that during the Bodega Street Fight, I was so happy to be there I pretty much cheered for everyone. Much to my Godsister’s chagrin, who hated that I cheered for Ron. But I am also a Shane Taylor Promotions fan. I was just so happy about both Takeover and the STP factions getting more recognition. And then to have Brian, Hugh, and Letty a part of it, and my friends sitting front row, I was just soo happy to be there.
This show emphasized that it is important to support your friends and family at any level. And everything is more special when there are loved ones around. I can not wait to do more in the independent wrestling space that will continue to uplift the black community.
I met Stephen in Dallas, Texas through Brian who was his mentor when they were at Morgan State together. He shared that he also worked in media, recently moved to New Jersey from Maryland, and wanted to do more with his business, SZN Media.
Stephen: My goals with SZN Media is to bring seasons to life! This can be anything a client may need from a media standpoint in order to propel them in their purpose. Overall, my goal for SZN Media is to grow it to a successful marketing agency with a full staff and office environment.
Stephen: The best piece of advice I heard was “Impact”. Impact is an abbreviation that my grandfather used and it means “I must personally act.” This means that within life, I am in many situations and it’s up to me to make change and provide action when necessary.
In 2022, nothing matters in life if you do not create media content surrounding it. Think about it, do we do anything without documenting it on social media? Whether its checking in on Facebook, posting photos on Instagram, or creating TikToks, we all feel the compulsion to capture moments and curate them for the world for your followers to see. Your social media presence, depending on what you do for a living, is the snapshot of who you are as a person. That is a lot of pressure, but it is important to make sure that it is the highest quality.
So make sure that when you do capture these moments, like when I wanted to get good memories of J. Bouji’’s big match, take the time to have professional photographers, videographers, etc. Investing in your brand is the best thing you can do .
By Patricia Rogers | Posted Monday, May 16, 2022
Seeing yourself how other people see you
My sister and I have been joking about how in the last 3 years time has become a "mind fuck". Things that happened in 2019 feel like 3 weeks ago and things that happened last year feel like it was years ago. It is mind-blowing how much the world has changed in such a short time.
In my orbit, I have experienced a lot of loss. And because of how I am built, I try to just pick my head up, swim forward, and try not to look back. But I do have to take a second and accept that life has been fucking hard, and I have been doing all I can to get through.
This edition is dedicated to the loved ones I have lost since the pandemic started: my creative writing teacher Ms. Bremmer, my Grandmother, Cousin Sameemah, Natalia, Kenny, and my high school love Deshon. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of all of you and what you meant to my life. Your friends, family, students, and loved ones are forever in my thoughts and prayers.
If you are reading this I urge you to please let people know what they mean to you while you can. You never know when it will be the last time you hear from them.
I am normally a pretty nostalgic person, but I have to admit that the heartbreak of loss led me to want to go back in time when things in my life seemed perfect.
One of those safe spaces for me growing up besides wrestling was always Harry Potter. What made HP special to me growing up was being able to get lost in the wizarding world. Learn lessons about the hard choices in life between love and hate, good and evil, easy and right, and countless others.
So my sister and are in the middle of rereading the series, it would be her first time and my third or fourth. The big thing for me is the message of bravery and pushing through the hardships for the greater good. If you love watching the Harry Potter movies (I mean, come on, when is it not on TV) then I highly recommend reading the book series. JK Rowling can be problematic, but the magic she delivered with the books can be considered life-changing.
One of the most influential voices in our lives is the ones that are inside our heads. The one that speaks to us and determines how we see ourselves. I think that is why people loved Issa Rae's bathroom mirror raps where she would motivate herself to be the best person that she could be for herself.
I recently lost my high school love who since the day we met put me on a pedestal. He thought I was the prettiest, smartest, flyest, and the most amazing girl he ever knew. And I loved that at the time when we were both teenagers. We broke up 14 years ago and he never changed his view of me. I hadn't seen him since high school graduation but we kept in touch by a phone call a few times a year. And he still talked about the positive impact I had on his life, and how much he wished he’d had it all this time.
I have to admit, I took him and this light he saw me in for granted. I used to be annoyed that my ex was still trying to get with me or saw me as the 15-year-old girl he fell in love with. But now, that he is gone and I have dealt with so much emotion over the years, I would give anything to hear his voice tell me how perfect I am. Losing Deshon has been understandably heartbreaking but it did come with a lesson for me, to never take people for granted.
At his funeral, I was reunited with high school friends. Sucked that it takes a funeral to bring us back together but it was nice to see them. It was comforting to me when we all went back to the same dynamic of friendship, and we all had the same personalities even all these years later. We all claimed to make sure we kept in touch after the service, and well knew that probably wasn’t true. However, it was nice to come together in Deshon’s memory and it was just like it would have been back in high school.
“Sex sells” I have been hearing that since I was younger, and grew up through sex tape scandals, and the birth of OnlyFans. As a woman, there is this pressure to appeal to the male gaze for success. It is unfair and yet it is also a way that women have been able to feel empowered. I have been glad to see society start to change its views on sex work, strippers, and women being naked because they like being naked. But then there is that thin line of, how much is too sexy?
My tip for social media and brand marketing when it comes to sex appeal is to do what makes you feel comfortable. I personally use the motto that I dont post or engage in content that I would not be proud to show my Dad. But that is me. Obviously, there will be influencers who pose in lingerie for work and must have parents that are okay with it, which is why I say it depends on each individual’s comfort level.
Your followers appreciate and follow you for the authenticity of your account. If you do not feel comfortable being “sexy” it will not resonate. So when you do take that step just make sure it is something you want to do
4/20 this year, I went outside to Brooklyn for Battle Club Pro’s Women Crush Wednesday wrestling show. The all-female card featured some of indie wrestling’s darlings like Trish Adora and Willow Nightengale. The highlight for me however was being able to see Big Swole in another main even title match defending her Battle Club Pro championship. After the hard-hitting match against Trish, Swole cut a promo that nearly brought tears to my eyes. There have been many moments in the last couple of months that made me so incredibly happy to be a wrestling fan, and this was one of them.
Swole is a black woman in wrestling who has always been outspoken, and unapologetic about the experience of being a black female wrestler. Her well-known departure from All Elite Wrestling & falling out with owner Tony Khan allowed showed us just how hard it can be. Swole however has always held her head high and been a voice for those that need it in the industry.
Here is some of her groundbreaking promo:
“I’ll be champ forever
Can’t Nobody can come in here and take what I take
Can’t Nobody can come in here and do what I do
Can’t nobody come in here and wrestle how I wrestle
OKAY
Except for Trish Fucking Adora
You want to talk about a diamond in the rough?
You want to talk about a woman that’s paid her dues?
You want to talk about a woman that cares for this business?
That was just one
When it comes to winning and defending this
Here as ya’ll champion
I’m going to give the people that have no say
I’m going to give the people that have been loyalty
The ones that whose not trying to turn their back or change
We are icons
We are woman
We are idols to the younger generation, the children who are watching us
We will be the change because that is what battle club is all about
Please give it up to Trish Adora
I’m going to say this
Battle Club is one of the only places that actually believed in me
Joakim is one of the only promoters that flew me out and gave me the time and day
I owe so much to this man.
I owe my career to this man
If it wasn't for God putting me in his ear, I would not be here
So I thank Joakim,
I thank (Hard to hear)
I thank my all-mighty father
Ya’ll have a good night”
I am excited to see what Big Swole continues to teach and bring to all women in wrestling.
By Patricia Rogers | Posted Sunday, August 1, 2021
Lately, I have been thinking a lot about happiness. I read somewhere that it is not a destination, that happiness is an ongoing journey. But for some reason, it has been feeling like a battle. There are so many aspects of life that lead to this pursuit. There is your personal/social life, physical/mental health, professional, and family. I can go on and on. This is why it is important to take care of yourself from the inside and out. Is there peace and happiness in your orbit?
I met Mike, aka Nisho, via social media when he joined our wrestling Twitter community. He was nice, funny, and I learned that he was multi-talented. He is a musician and podcaster. His friends would describe him as laid back, stubborn, and caring.
He hosts a podcast called The Cole and Soul Podcast:
“Alongside my cohost Nicole Learner, we highlight artists, entrepreneurs, and business owners (we emphasize Black/people of color) within the DC, Maryland, and Virginia areas. (Commonly referred to as the DMV).
We offer a mix of humor, introspective conversation, and a safe space for the people we interview to really dive deep into the person behind the art. On top of that, I am the sole wrestling fan among us haha. Nic handles all of the technical sides of the podcast as far as editing audio and visual, I handle the booking of our guests and some social media across FB and Twitter.”
Keep your finger on the pulse of your field. One thing that is important about thriving in the digital space is finding an audience and community. There are billions of people online that you need to find that will be dedicated and engaged in your content. And you also have to be able to provide the information they seek. This means you have to always have your finger on the pulse. For example, once I realized I wanted to start a wrestling podcast, I listened to the most popular wrestling podcast that was out at the time. I also consumed all of the wrestling I could and followed other fan groups and communities. Soon we became the go-to place for women’s wrestling news, and opinions.
By Patricia Rogers | Posted Wednesday, July 14, 2021
Welcome back to Words with P.R.! This is such an interesting time in my life. Grateful to have this as an outlet.
This edition is inspired by tennis player Naomi Osaka’s choice to take a break from tennis to take care of her mental health. I think it is important to motivate my readers to opt to swim and not sink, but it is also important to emphasize that when feeling you are going to sink… it is okay to not be okay. It is okay to reach out for help.
Huge thanks to the support that the last edition has gotten, where I talk about my journey towards self-love, acceptance, and body image.
Birdiebee is a brand that I have supported for a couple of years now. And at first, it was just because it was WWE Hall of Famers Nikki and Brie Bella’s clothing line. But once I started to purchase clothing, I loved the fit, fabrics, and designs. The biggest thing for me, though, was how inclusive the pieces are for all body types. I shared my story about it in the 4th edition of Words with P.R., but it really is life-changing when you can feel confident in your own skin. So far I have purchased dresses, activewear, t-shirts, and sweaters. And I recommend it all. You can use code BBAMBASSADOR20 to save site-wide at this link.
SHOUTOUT TO 400 YEARS OF INEQUALITY
I want to share immersive multimedia projects from the University of Orange educating the public on 400 Years of Inequality aka Juneteenth:
A Call Answered: Observing History -- Reclaiming the Future + People's Pathway to Equality
A Call Answered spotlights the change-inspiring work of 5 community-based 400 Years “observances”, events unearthing and acknowledging America’s timeline of inequality, and setting the stage for a new century of recovery.
Art Direction, Media & Digital Content: Gahlia Eden
Creative Producer, Media & Digital Content: Aubrey Murdock
Creative Direction, Marketing Strategy: Stephanie Leone
Editorial Direction, Marketing Strategy: Ricky Tucker
Creative Team: Timothy Nottage, Jacqueline Castaneda, Molly Kaufman, Robert Sember
People's Pathway to Equity provides multimedia activities and the key concepts most critical to understanding and dismantling the ecology of inequality in your community. Across four chapters, you’ll explore the many insights gathered by the 400 Years of Inequality coalition over five years of learning and organizing together, introducing you to people from a range of places who have boldly answered the call for equality, and helping you embark on your own pathway to equity.
Art Direction: Aubrey Murdock
Creative Producer: Timothy Nottage
Creative Team: Aditi Nair, Jacqueline Castaneda, Timothy Nottage
Media + Digital Content: Gahlia Eden
Editorial Direction: Ricky Tucker
Marketing Strategy: Stephanie Leone
I had the chance to talk to some of the amazing team involved in the creation of these amazing educational experiences:
"The website was inspired by the covid-19 shutdown... Aubrey Murdock, Head of School at University of Orange, which was one of the founding partner organizations of 400 Years introduced me to this work. I invited local photographers and videographers to join me in attending and documenting observances." — Gahlia Eden
"I’d want folks to walk away from A Call Answered... with an impressionistic view of the hard work, love, and thoughtful activism it takes to acknowledge everything we’ve been through in this country—and that’s just an acknowledgement. Then comes the hard work of rebuilding, recovering. Our coalition and these websites can be a template for how communities can honor their own historical context—and recovery collectively. The Peoples Pathway site in particular maps out the tools for them to get started." — Ricky Tucker
CHECK IT OUT HERE: 400YEARSOFINEQUALITY.ORG
Consistency is key
When I wanted to start a podcast, I did as much research as I could about what makes these successful. Having the right equipment, topics, and the audience is important. But the number one note I saw everywhere was BE CONSISTENT. This is how you earn dedicated listeners/viewers. You have to be consistent on every aspect of your brand. This means your brand identity, release schedule, social media marketing, everything. Your fans will not even realize how much they are getting used to your content and will engage with it. Most successful podcasts and YouTube channels don’t have the best quality, but their success comes from being consistent.
By Patricia Rogers | Posted Friday, June 18, 2021
What is the saying? You make plans and God laughs? I have been coming to terms with this for years. I’ve learned: don’t take it personally. You’re not “doing life wrong.” I’ve realized that the ups, downs, uncertainty, and mistakes we will all ultimately make, are just... life. When I started to take my struggle with anxiety and depression seriously I made a vow not to let it ruin my life. I ask myself: are you going to swim or sink?* As hard as it is, I always choose to swim. And this is only possible with the love and support of my friends, family, and the continued pursuit towards living a full life.
I recently chose to swim:
My twin sister Letty and I had been planning a trip to Las Vegas for Memorial Day weekend. For the first time, I was going away, paid vacation days, money in my savings account, and ahead on rent. Proud adult moment. And then, two weeks before the trip I get a severe toothache. And a very long and uninteresting story short, I had to get a tooth extracted. Booooo.
I am now depressed during the week leading up to this fun trip. I hate the dentist, I hate dealing with medical shit, I had to stop eating and enjoying my vices. And of course, my shitty insurance didn’t cover everything so I had to spend all of the money in my savings account that I was so proud of. I was very close to canceling the trip but didn’t want to let my sister and friend down. Glad I didn’t just because it was not the perfect trip I had in mind, doesn’t mean I should sink and not go.
So I swam and went to Vegas anyway. Yeah, I couldn’t eat real food, or smoke legalized weed, but so what? I went and it was fucking awesome. I actually stayed offline from work and the podcast to truly escape and have a good time. We met some of the coolest people (other black travelers) and made unforgettable memories.
My Las Vegas recommendations are the SAHARA Hotel, ReLeaf Weed Dispensary (my sister loved it), and definitely walking the strip. And I can not stress enough, even my melanin queens and kings WEAR FUCKING SUNSCREEN! So I hope this inspires you to push through even when things do not go as planned. While in Vegas, missing teeth and all, I rediscovered a piece of myself and learned that just because something isn’t perfect doesn’t mean it’s not worth it. Literally, nothing in life will go completely as planned. And that is perfectly okay.
I went to high school with Whitney, and she was one of my best friends. We shared a love and respect for each other I still feel ‘til this day. She was always a great writer and could honestly do anything she set her mind to (as corny as that sounds).
In her words, “Whitney Chanel Clark is a stand up comedian in New York City pushing the boundaries of comedy in what's now a politically correct world. I’d say Whitney Chanel is the entertainer and Clark is the business woman. All together, it’s the total package”.
In the last few years I have watched her try her hand at comedy, and go on to be the leader of Clark House Comedy, as well as a mentor for queer comedians. When I asked her about those boundaries in comedy she has pushed she said, “My brand of comedy impacts the LGBTQIA+ community by encouraging the more aggressive/dominant women to embrace their femininity. I’m that old school gay, don’t ask don’t tell gay, I think it’s fine to dress like a man and not want to turn into one. My brand of comedy is about making regular gay cool again.”
She has weekly shows around the country and has been featured on Bravo, VH1, and BuzzFeed.
When building your social media presence, no matter that platform: INTERACT AND ENGAGE WITH EVERYTHING. I think something that people forget when it comes to social media is that everyone on it are real people. Actual humans who are taking their time to engage with your platform. Acknowledge them. It is not about the follower count — in my opinion that is important — it's the amount of real (not bots) humans that react to your content.
